Guide for men on How to buy lingerie for a woman
June 15th, 2016
A few days ago, a friend asked me to go shopping with him for a gift to his girlfriend: he wanted to buy her some lingerie but had no idea about it. Buying lingerie to a woman might seem intimidating, but it doesnt have to be. In fact, I think it is one of the most personal gifts you can give a partner. Get it right and all manner of sexy times await. Get it wrong, however – and sadly this is what happens often – and she will see you in a whole new light. Let’s just say it won’t be flattering.
Here’s what you need to know, it’s not about what you find erotically appealing. Rather, it’s about what she feels most confident and comfortable in. These are the two c’s you need to keep top of mind when going shopping.
So, how do you figure out what she feels most confident and comfortable in? The answer lies in what she already owns.There are many types of lingerie out there, so look to your significant other’s own purchases for hints. If all she has ever worn are cotton boyshorts, she may not respond too well to a lacy pair of crotchless panties. Also, pay attention to items like favourite labels, recurring styles – G or brief for example, colours that keep recurring and even fabrics like satin or lace.
Just a reminder…..Almost all women feel uncomfortable with some aspect of their bodies while some women feel self-conscious with the revealing nature of lingerie. It’s likely that you have a far higher opinion of your lady’s body than she does.
For those reasons, I recommend focusing your search on items that you want to see her in. You could drive yourself crazy trying to figure out her style, but I think your time is better spent looking for pieces that you think would look smoking hot on her. Love her legs? Try a pair of thigh-highs with a seam up the back. Love her butt? Try a skimpy pair of underwear that shows plenty of cheek. Tell her your reasons for the specific item when you give her the gift. If she hears you say, “I thought these lingerie would look perfect on your perky little ass”, she probably won’t care that you didn’t exactly nail her personal style.
Another important aspect to keep in mind is when is the right time to give lingerie as a gift….Some occasions work better than others. I actually think it’s a perfect “just because” gift. Surprise lingerie can be the type of much needed shake-up that most people’s sex lives direly need.
Conversely, it can be a little cheesy for Valentine’s Day or an anniversary, unless you’re a regular Casanova. And, while you know your lady best, I’d advise not giving lingerie after a fight or as an apology (because let’s face it, it’s a bit of a gift for yourself too)!
It’s also best to avoid lingerie if your girlfriend has been struggling with serious body image issues, an eating disorder, or health or ability issues that might make her physically incapable of putting on her new gifts. Check in with her first.
Now that you have an idea on what to buy and what not to buy,here comes the answer to the How – here you have two options-by heading into a store (brave) and going online (convenient but sometimes sketchy). Keep in mind that what you’re looking for are items which are similar to those she already owns but better. This is where a skilled shop assistant can be your best ally. And there’s no need to feel awkward about the discussion. It’s 2016. Just don’t use the word ‘panties’ please. In case you choose going to the store by yourself, relax… polite, respectful men are more than welcome in lingerie stores. Lingerie sales associates have had far more uncomfortable interactions than you fumbling to describe what you’re looking for, and are more than happy to help you find something special.
Ladies who sleep with ladies, this is another area that’s easier for you!